The Age Of Engagement

The Ring Finger is the new middle finger to single twentysomethings.

 I guess we are at an age where marriage isn't so far off. Where people are getting pregnant on purpose. One-by-one my friends boyfriends get down on one knee, while I'm still down on two knees trying to get a second date.

I don't know what I would do if someone proposed to me. Or even if I was asked to live with someone other than my dog (who eats the crumbs from my floor).

It took me a while to even try a ring on 'that finger', but as I search for the feeling your parents promised you would experience, also known as love, I wonder if my 'ring finger' will always be barren.

Butterflies were so easy when you were younger. Your gut told you who you liked, but now it's your head. You begin to form a 'must have' checklist that grows after every date-gone-wrong: 

• university education
• dual citizenship
• tall
• not on social media
• not religious
• loves his family (from a distance)
• has friends
• likes staying home sometimes
• likes travelling
• enjoys drinking

Maybe the people getting married in their 20's locked down a significant other before their list grew too long. Before their head took over their heart. Therefore, they can plunge into a promise of 'forever and always'. 

Just as the old saying goes; the rich get richer and the poor get poorer, the same can be said for The Age of Engagement; The couples get closer, whilst the singles get pickier. 

So what can stop us singles from spiralling into the depths of despair, riding a motorized scooter around WalMart buying 10lbs of discount chocolate every February 15th? 

Have a single friend (or friends).
- if you're going down, bring someone with you.

Have a cynical coupled friend.
- she/he loves being in a relationship but enjoys dabbling in the fun. They are living proof you can have it all. 

Have a heart-to-heart with your head.
- does your checklist give you butterflies, or paper work? If you feel a spark with a guy on the street or at a bar, follow your heart, prepare with your head, and make your move. Sparks aren't easy to come by.

Have fun.
- If dating is causing you to have a nervous breakdown, step back. Delete your Tinder app, go out with your friends, and enjoy your life. 

- Elizabeth George

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These are the good ol' days.

It's happened many times before. I'm having a massage, I'm hanging out with a friend, I'm cuddling with a lover (or Chandler) but I can't seem to enjoy it, until I know how it'll end. It's as if knowing when it will 'end' helps me enjoy the 'now'.

Have you ever missed someone only when they are moments before leaving?

When someone is moving away, they have the biggest party.
When you know you'll break up, you have the deepest conversation.
When you have to wake up, your bed is the most comfortable.

Maybe it's the knowledge of what is going to happen that allows you to live in the moment. I always want to know what happens in a movie before watching it. It helps me to put all the scary or sad moments into perspective.

Too bad life isn't as easy as looking up movie spoilers. What you can't do is look up where you'll be in 5 years, who you'll be, who you'll love, or where you'll live.

Since I can't 'know' for sure, does this mean I won't enjoy it until it's over? I worry about that sometimes, and with my 25th birthday come-and-gone, I'm looking back at all the times I remember with my friends, and rarely any of them were planned. Sometimes life is what happens when you're busy making plans. You may not notice it, but it's true.

I think the sentiment is best captured when Andy from the Office says: 'I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've left them.'

With the knowledge that we can't know, and never will, maybe there are some things we can do to stay 'in the moment'. 

1. Feel it.
- Whether you stop to the smell the roses or feel the soft fur of your dog, you're feeling something and your mind is remembering. Your boyfriends hand holding yours. Your hair being brushed behind your ear. The cold of your pillow against your tired face at night.

2. Prioritize.
- Did you have plans to go grocery shopping and get to the car wash but you get a call from your friend at the beach? Prioritize the plans you've made. Sure your car could be cleaner, but that won't be what you look back on in a few years.

3. Take the smile test.
- Have you ever heard a joke and laughed until your sides hurt, but forgot what the joke was? That's because the act of smiling or laughing is what you'll remember, not what caused it. This is a shared, or solo, experience you'll look back on at some point in your life.

Here's hoping, as we dive deeper into our twenties, that we can realize; these are the good ol' days. Whether they are spent single, fat and living in a tiny apartment, when you look back, you'll remember the guys you dated, the amazing meals you ate, and the fun you had in that place you called home.

- Elizabeth George

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facebook.com/theundomesticated

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Post First Date Trauma (PFDT)

As if going on a first date isn't traumatic enough, the real trauma occurs if it was a good date. What happens next?

DISCLAIMER: The following post is based on dating in general and does not depict one person or date in particular. Any similarities are purely coincidental...

If a date goes badly we can easily accept it and move on. But what if it was a good date and we want another? If we've taken a sip of the relationship kool-aid and we like it? 'We' being neurotic picky singles who want it all, and we want it all now. It must be the same feeling guys get when their relationship 'taxi light' turns on, except ours manifests on a person, not an idea. We inevitably ask ourselves, I like you... now what?


Basing this off of personal experience, after recently throwing myself back into the dating game, I've determined there are 10 post-date stages we go through:

1. That was amazing. I'm on cloud 9! 
2. Tell everyone.
3. I should text him.
4. Actually, why hasn't he texted me?
5. He hated me.
6. I'm texting him something reviewed, and approved, by all of my peers.
7. He hasn't replied...
8. GOD, WHAT DID I DO?!
9. I shouldn't have said anything. The date wasn't good anyway!
10. He replied. He loves me. We have a second date.

Now, I don't really know the solution to easing this Post First Date Trauma (PFDT), besides him texting you, but I do have some suggestions. Keep in mind, I did not follow these suggestions hence why I'm still single in the city.

Be Breezy
- Keep your cool, be calm, and stay confident. If you had fun and you liked him, it's great that you're able to self identify. (Figuring out what you like is better than trying to figure out what he likes).

Be Natural
- Don't disrupt the flow. If you want to text, text. But be sure you have something to say (and that you're prepared to know the answer).

Be Yourself
- It's the 21st century so if you want a second date, leave a little breathing space to absorb, and ask away! Be direct. Make it a question that can be answered with a simple 'yes' or 'no'.

Good luck to all you hopeless romantic singles out there and remember, going on a date and putting yourself out there is hard, but it can be worth it. They may not always feel the same way post-date, but that's a two way street. One day, putting yourself out there will payout in the most beautiful way. And if it doesn't? You'll always have two boyfriends tucked in your freezer. Mr. Ben and Mr. Jerry.  

- Elizabeth George

twitter.com/georgeelizabeth

facebook.com/theundomesticated

instagram.com/georgeelizabeth

What's a Champagne Birthday?

DEFINITION: A champagne birthday is a birthday in which you turn the age of the day you were born. 
For instance, 25 on the 25th. 
If this happens, you pop champagne (although you don't really need an excuse). I celebrated my champagne birthday with close friends in my tiny bachelor apartment where we spent the night drinking champagne, listening to "Ladies be Pre-Drinking", and playing Bingo (get your own customizable template at the end of the post)...


Get inspired for your next birthday bash.

Cake by: Love Sugar Cakes
Balloons by: The Balloon Studio
Bingo cards by: moi
Friends quotes by: moi

My favourite champagne with some thrift shop champagne glasses.

Keeping it classy with neon lights.

Everyone needs a smoke break now and then...

From memorable hook-ups to personality traits, this was a fun game.

LEFTOVERS!

BONUS: Bingo Card Template
TIP - Create a custom hashtag for your party so you can easily find pictures and tweets taken during the night. 

- georgeelizabeth

Twitter: @georgeelizabeth

Facebook: /theundomesticated

Instagram: @georgeelizabeth

The Battle of the Buzzer...

Okay, so I'm perpetually single, and I live alone, but that doesn't mean I don't think about others. Others being those living in apartments who found their 'lobster' or opted for a roommate. From one-on-one hangouts to throwing a rager, there is always one issue that plagues apartment dwellers in an apartment with more than one dweller; 'the battle of the buzzer'. 

What is the 'battle of the buzzer'?

It's when 2 or more people live in an apartment and only one person's phone is connected to the front door buzzer. That person also tends to be the one who takes last minute showers, loses their phone in the couch cushions, or has it on silent, hence a lot of buzz's go unnoticed, and the roommate/gf/bf make the trek downstairs to let people in. 

Why do I bring this up? 

Because I found solution worth sharing!
Roommates can rejoice and lovers can... continue loving. No longer do you have to make unnecessary elevator trips or have guests feel abandoned when your buzzer goes unanswered. And to be honest, when you leave people in your apartment to let someone in, they snoop (or at least I do). 

What is this miraculous invention?

Easy Buzzer gives everyone who lives in the apartment control of the buzzer by connecting it to two or more phones. From booty calls to pizza delivery, no one can judge your buzz. 

Who can use it?

- Families
- Couples 
- Roommates
- Single people who's dogs can answer the phone ("Yes, this is dog")


The creator of Easy Buzzer, Dan Fraser, was someone who threw countless parties and personally made the trip up-and-down 30 stories to ensure everyone got in, despite buzzer (or roommate) malfunction. He recognized that he wasn't alone and decided to do something about it, and we're glad he did!

*GIVEAWAY*

To celebrate the launch of Vancouver's very own Easy Buzzer, The Undomesticated is giving away '1 Free Year of Easy Buzzer'! 
The winner will be announced over Twitter and Facebook on Tuesday March 18th. 
 a Rafflecopter giveaway

Get started with Easy Buzzer now for the price of a fancy Starbucks coffee.

This is not a sponsored post. 

-georgeelizabeth

Twitter: @georgeelizabeth

Facebook: /theundomesticated

Instagram: @georgeelizabeth